YOUTH CORNER

GOD WHO CAME IN SEARCH OF ME

The Holy Bible says, “I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all the wonderful things you have done. (Psalms 9:1)

This testimony is in honor and thanksgiving to my Loving Heavenly Father and Spiritual Teacher. I am grateful for having this opportunity to share my spiritual journey with you all. I have been associated with KLWC since 1995. Let me introduce myself and take you through my young days.

Born into a very loving Catholic family, I was youngest of the three siblings. My dad was a very caring, honest and disciplined person; while mom was strict, hardworking and took care of our studies. I remember how our parents ensured that we gather for the Holy Rosary which kept us united as a family. I was a fine student blessed with good grasping ability. I loved participating in sports and so, my parents enrolled me once for a running race in a community ground where children from different schools were participating. My parents and siblings were present in the stands to cheer me. The whistle was blown and everybody took off, so did I in full confidence; but somewhere midway mark I fell down. I looked around to see my parents encouraging me to get up and get going; my eyes also went to the crowd who began to laugh while the other participants raced past. I just stood there crying unable to continue. This incident had a deep effect on my psyche.  As life continued, this incident was forgotten and got on with my studies. I was having a good time in life enjoying the company of elders and friends. That’s when life took an ugly turn! I lost my dad at a tender age of twelve due to illness. I was so fond of him; hardly got a chance to know him and could not grasp that he was no more. I would often ask God why He had taken my dad away so soon from me. All of a sudden there was a vacuum which could not be filled. Following dad’s demise we had to leave the company quarters and relocate to a new location.

Disobedience sprouted in me and I began to lose interest in studies and certain subjects seemed more like a burden. I somehow completed my schooling all the while realizing that I was letting myself down. It was difficult to obtain a job without any technical background. Few years passed with our family being supported by my mother and sister who would take tuitions and go for work respectively. Unable to find a decent job; uncertainty about my future grew, losing my self-confidence and respect within my family. Guilt began invading me and the feeling that I was good-for -nothing took deep root in me. I had reached to the brink where I was unable to accept and saw myself in the shore of depression; devoid of any hope. An empty mind is the devil’s workshop was true in my case. I would often regret my actions; ask forgiveness but would never keep my promises. Meanwhile a friend of mine helped me to obtain job at his office.

The only escape from the world was music and would spend hours listening and singing western songs. Memorizing each lines of the song would be my favorite pastime and grant me peace. Gradually my interest in music led me to learn a musical instrument and through this I got acquainted with my parishioners. We would practice together; and also for special occasions and functions participate in the choir which made me a known figure in our small parish. Being engrossed with work and music I kept myself busy. Though everything seemed okay outside, I lacked peace. I would consider myself as a righteous person as I never meddled in other’s affairs, no habit of quarrelling and had a good relation with everyone; no bad name or enemies. But at the end of each passing day; I began to feel lonely even among friends; just me, myself.

Now life was bit brighter with a job, family support and friends. Again when we least expect life threw another blow to cut my joy. I was diagnosed with bronchitis, a severe breathing disorder. Again I would raise my question –Lord, I don’t smoke then how did I get this? But no response! The absence of a father shattered the unity of my family, and everyone had their way. The family prayer the source of unity was discontinued and frequent quarrels would take place. It was no more of a home!

But God had not given up on me and He had better plans in store…. when I least expected it.

It was in this crushing situation that my mother heard about KLWC prayer and began participating in the prayer for mothers. Under Respected Sister’s guidance and prayer support, my mother’s faith was renewed; and she was blessed with new hope and courage to deal with our life situation. She would share her experience with me, but I chose to ignore it. The Holy Verses, “Believe in me,” Lord Jesus said, “you and your family will be saved” (Acts 16:31) came true in our family. Praises to You my Lord!

As the saying goes ‘Ignorance is bliss’. My perception was that the definition of righteous tagged me as I would never hurt or harm anyone intentionally or involve in quarrels and think bad for someone. My health condition worsened and I was admitted. At my mother’s request, Respected Sister visited me at the hospital and prayed over me. Few weeks after my discharge, my mother again persuaded me to pay visit to KLWC. Though my pride and darkness would deter me; but my mother’s constant persuasion paid off and finally I agreed and accompanied her. What I saw was a person very unassuming and simple, with a gentle smile. On my mother’s request, she placed her holy and anointed hands over me and prayed. I experienced my stiffness depart and being filled with peace and holy relaxation. After the pray-over she told my mother, “There is nothing wrong. Everything is fine, He is a good boy.” Comforting words I had heard in a very long time. Thus passed my first day at KLWC. 

(to be continued on 19/02/16 )